Why You Shouldn’t Comment on Someone Else’s Weight

By Ysabel Vitangcol on September 24, 2020

You’re not Filipino if you’ve never been to a dinner party and heard the dreaded “Tumaba ka na!” Or maybe an officemate made an innocuous comment about your cheeks getting “chubbier.” Point is, hardly any of us have gone through life without ever hearing somebody else make negative comments about our bodies. And, *deep breath*, we can’t believe we still even have to say this, but commenting on someone’s weight in this manner is NOT okay. Why? We’ll give you five very good reasons.

1. The person you’re talking to knows their body better than you.

It’s normal for weight to fluctuate from time to time. And nobody can see the changes in their body better than, wait for it, themselves. They probably already know they’ve gained or lost some weight, and you pointing it out to them doesn’t help matters. At all. If you gained a few pounds and felt bad about it, would you want somebody to point it out, too? We didn’t think so!

2. Some of the things you’re pointing out are actually perfectly normal.

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Positive Vibes Only 🦄

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Having stretch marks, cellulite, or tummy rolls when you’re sitting down is normal, too. There’s no need to shame anyone for having a human body. Even the most athletic people have cellulite on their thighs! When a troll commented about Iza Calzado’s cellulite on one of her Instagram posts, Iza took the comments in stride—and even cracked a few jokes along the way! Meanwhile, Lexi Mendiola proudly posted a photo of her tiger stripes in 2017…and got featured by People Magazine as a result.

3. You don’t know what they’re going through.

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It is with immeasurable grief that we confirm the passing of Chadwick Boseman.⁣ ⁣ Chadwick was diagnosed with stage III colon cancer in 2016, and battled with it these last 4 years as it progressed to stage IV. ⁣ ⁣ A true fighter, Chadwick persevered through it all, and brought you many of the films you have come to love so much. From Marshall to Da 5 Bloods, August Wilson’s Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom and several more, all were filmed during and between countless surgeries and chemotherapy. ⁣ ⁣ It was the honor of his career to bring King T’Challa to life in Black Panther. ⁣ ⁣ He died in his home, with his wife and family by his side. ⁣ ⁣ The family thanks you for your love and prayers, and asks that you continue to respect their privacy during this difficult time. ⁣ ⁣ Photo Credit: @samjonespictures

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Many people lose and gain weight due to traumatic life events or illnesses. Over the quarantine period, hundreds of people bashed the late Chadwick Boseman for losing a significant amount of weight. Memes were created, and laughs were had. Little did everyone know, the Black Panther star was suffering from stage 4 colon cancer. The body-shaming that Chadwick experienced is a painful reminder to think twice before commenting on someone else’s weight changes. Because you truly never know what somebody is going through. (Rest in power, Chadwick.)

4. It might cause unnecessary pain…and it doesn’t benefit *you* at all.

Hearing negative comments about your body hurts. We didn’t need to tell you that—you know the feeling, so you shouldn’t ever make somebody else feel that way. You don’t gain anything from commenting on someone else’s body. It only results in hurt and shame for the other party. Golden rule: Unless it’s something they can change in 10 seconds (i.e. food stuck in their teeth, a stray lock of hair), don’t comment about it!

5. What a body looks like doesn’t reflect what it’s capable of.

OK, so everyone knows Lizzo. (Sing it with us: Why men great ‘til they gotta be great?) Some will take one look at her body and think, “This girl is so unhealthy.” But actually, the singer and performer does regular high-intensity workouts with battle ropes, weights, and resistance bands. She’s so fit, she can play the flute while twerking. But because her body doesn’t look it, she gets body-shamed every day and night. See the lesson here?

6. It is simply not your business.

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Down by the pool 💙

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Look, unless you’re someone’s doctor, you have no real reason to talk negatively about someone’s body. (Now that we think about it, even doctors don’t do that.) What you see on the outside is not a complete picture of someone’s health, and your comments don’t do anything to improve it, anyway. If someone wants to improve their body by working out or trying a muscle-toning treatment, great! If someone wants to treat themselves to a box of pizza, great! Not your body, not your business. Again, remember how you would feel if the comments were directed at *you.*

We’re all on our own journey towards self-love and body acceptance. Instead of putting others down, you can reach your goals together by being encouraging and supportive. Have a great day, Belo Beauties!

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